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Matija27
Just a regular guy making cartoons to entertain people :)

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Zagreb, Croatia

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REVIEWS: Snowhite, Lockout, Prometheus, Rock of Ages and Ted

Posted by Matija27 - August 15th, 2012


I know these movies came a while ago, but hey, here are the reviews anyway.

Snowhite and The Huntsman
I was looking forward to see this movie. Any tale that goes that gritty and dark route makes me hyped. But unfortunately, after seeing Snowhite and The Huntsman I want movie studios to stop making does gritty fairy tales bullshit. They tried, it failed, move on for pete's sake. But apparently this one is going to get a sequel. Well, maybe, just maybe sequel could be better. I mean, after this borefest of a movie, the sequel has nowhere to go but up. And this one is a really, REALLY, boring movie. It is not a good sing when you can't wait for the movie to finish, and it is not because you need to go to the toilet. This movie tries to be epic, serious, making us invested with all sorts of different twists to the old fairy tale... but no. Let me be clear, it is not a bad movie. Visually it is pretty impressive. But that is all it is. Eyecandy. The story is boring, acting is mediocre, characters are bland, no redeeming qualities whatsoever, and pretty visuals are not worth it. Oh and one more thing. People say that Kirsten Stewart shouldn't been cast as Snowhite since she can't possibly be prettier than Charlize Theron. I agree, but maybe they could cast somebody...less pretty as the Queen. Just sayin.

Lockout
Now here is an awesome movie that you will either love or hate. I love it. It is a movie you've seen a million times. An ex soldier/cop/something (who cares really) need to save presidents daughter from a prison run my prison inmates... IN SPACE! Yeah, the premise is silly but this movie knows it and it doesn't try to be anything more than what it is, a silly action packed movie with great one-liners, one hot female lead, and a badass motherfu**** as a main protagonist with some plot twists here and there. Turn your brain off and enjoy the movie. You won't regret it.

Prometheus
Is it an alien prequel? As long as it is a good movie by itself, who cares? Now this is also one of those that you've already seen a million times. Group of people find out about a planet where could possibly be our creators. They decide to find out the answers of our existence and shit happens. Shit happens and we are left without answer at the end. Yeah, it sucks. It is really nothing special, not bad but not good either. You won't miss much by not seeing it but I got to tell you, and it might sound a bit morbid, but it has the best abortion scene ever put on the film. Come to think of it, maybe this is the only abortion scene on the film... but it rocks. And with this last sentence let me segwey to last review...

Rock of Ages
What is with all the bad reviews? It is a freakin rock musical! Did people really expected some deep storyline and tearjerking scenes? Come on! Whatever happened to enjoying the movies? I understand if you don't like rock, fine, but don't go watch it and then complain it sucks. But it is a job of those snobby movie critics, so... yeah. Anyway, this one is definitely going on my top 10 movie list. It has awesome songs, funny and silly characters, simple storyline that works, and a monkey! What more do you want? Rock on!

Ted
Live action Family Guy. Nuff said.


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